I read the books. I went to the website. I clicked join and filled out the profile. The moment I hit submit and officially became Sphdz 506088, havoc struck!
Agent Agrinpix and Agent Turtle burst into my room with cattle prods, screaming “SURRENDER OR DIE!” Purple-tentacled aliens slid in on bioluminescent goo, groaning and waving their appendages. I shrieked and backed into the corner of my room as the agents bared in on me.
“Surrender?” Agrinpix asked me.
I was trembling. I was scared. The aliens were destroying my room, and these agents with cattleprods wanted to kill me. But then I thought of the Sphdz creed. And I remembered that if there weren’t 3.14 million Spaceheadz really soon, EVERYONE would die.
So I stood and faced the agents bravely. “I will never surrender! I am a Spaceheadz and will stay loyal!”
Turtle roared with rage and swung his cattleprod at me. I ducked, slid between Agrinpix’s legs, crawled across the room, dodged the gooey tentacle one of the aliens sent at me, and ran out of the door!
The agents and the aliens chased me, and I wondered why they weren’t fighting each OTHER – their enemies! Then, as I sprinted out of the house and down the road, my pursuers at my heels, I remembered the old adage: My enemy’s enemy is my friend. If I was BOTH of their enemies, maybe it meant they were working…together?
That was creepy.
A car passed by slowly on the road, and I climbed onto the hood and yelled, “GO GO GO!” They zoomed away with me hanging on for dear life, past Main Street and towards the elementary school. Unfortunately, there was a red light, and I could see the owner of the car was about to get out and ask me some questions – I didn’t want that.
So I slid off the car, climbed the brand-new playground fence, and hid behind the school building. Thankfully, he didn’t chase me, and I nervously began a walk.
Suddenly, I came upon this strange-looking house and heard an ‘eep eep eep.’ Something about that tickled my brain, and I peeked through the window.
“OH MY GOSH!” It was Bob! And Jennifer! And Michael K – who was much cuter in real life then the illustrations made him out to be. I swooned and nearly passed out – my heroes!
Michael K turned and saw me at the window, then. Even shocked, his eyes still sparkled. “WHO ARE YOU??” he asked frantically.
I held up my hands in a gesture of innocence. “It’s okay! I’m a Sphdz. My name’s Lissie. I’m 10.”
He smiled slightly, and I felt blood rush into my cheeks. “Whew. Hey, do you wanna come in, see the HQ? I mean, you can’t tell, of course. Wow, I’ve never met another Sphdz before, except for TJ and Venus.”
Michael K opened the door for me, and I stepped in with as much dignity as I could muster. “Thanks, Michael K. That means a lot to me.”
Bob and Jennifer turned from their computers among the crazy hodgepodge of stuff and gave me strained alien smiles. I stammered, looked around, thought ‘ohmygoshrealaliens!’ and decided bowing would be the safest option.
Jennifer looked pleased. “This girl thinks we are royal, Bob.”
Bob frowned. “I am not a king! I am Bob! And I am a boy! A normal Earth boy who does normal Earth things.”
Michael K came up behind me and pulled me into standing position. “Don’t worry, you guys. She’s a Sphdz too. But I don’t think she’s ever met, y’know, aliens before.”
“Sorry,” I stammered. “I haven’t been a Sphdz for very long. I had just logged on when these two agents with cattle prods and two gooey-tentacled aliens came to attack me!”
Michael K looked at me with wide, impressed eyes, and suddenly it was worth it. “Tell us!”
So I told them my story, and Michael K was totally psyched. “This means that the agents think we’re powerful! Like a threat! I mean, I’m sorry you had to go through that, Lissie.”
I shook my head. “It was okay. Kinda cool, actually.”
“But wow, we might actually reach the deadline if the AGENTS are scared! This sorta rocks!” Michael K’s eyes shone with excitement.
Bob frowned. “But Lissie’s room was destroyed. How will she clean it before her parents come home?”
I coughed. “Actually, I was going to ask you guys a favor…”
By the time my parents came home, my room was spick and span, thanks to Jen and Bob, and Michael K and I had promised to meet up before school tomorrow. It wasn’t officially a date, but it was almost one.
And best of all, I was a Spaceheadz! Which meant a little confusion, a lot of adventure, tons of weirdness and a heaping handful of coolness!